Another animation... Made of screenshots from www.donghaeng.net... Enjoy, and think...
He is so far you may think, but step back... And you will see...
He is so near, but you don't know.
What the...
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What's wrong?! Hey dude! It is just a small challenge! You can do it! Yes! YOU CAN DO IT!
YES! I KNOW I CAN DO IT! ZHENG HOW YOU CAN DO IT! AHHHHH!!!
Oh God, please grant me strength and wisdom so that I can serve more diligently. Please help our team so that the camp will be a success and glory be Your blessed name!
I know I can do it...
Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
YES! I KNOW I CAN DO IT! ZHENG HOW YOU CAN DO IT! AHHHHH!!!
Oh God, please grant me strength and wisdom so that I can serve more diligently. Please help our team so that the camp will be a success and glory be Your blessed name!
I know I can do it...
Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
With His help, I CAN DO IT !
珊瑚海
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很久没听到这首歌了,今天突然又看到这首歌...
感觉还是像当初听的时候一样...一首凄美的歌...
周杰伦 & Lara 的 珊瑚海
(合)
转身离开分手说不出来
海鸟跟鱼相爱
(梁心颐)
(合)
(合)
海鸟跟鱼,难道真的只是一场意外...
感觉还是像当初听的时候一样...一首凄美的歌...
周杰伦 & Lara 的 珊瑚海
悲伤要怎么平静纯白
我的脸上始终挟带
一抹浅浅的无奈
(梁心颐)
我的脸上始终挟带
一抹浅浅的无奈
你用唇语说你要离开(情不在)
(合)
那难过无声慢了下来
汹涌潮水你听明白
不是浪而是泪海
那难过无声慢了下来
汹涌潮水你听明白
不是浪而是泪海
转身离开分手说不出来
海鸟跟鱼相爱
只是一场意外
我们的爱(我们的爱)
差异一直存在(回不来)
风中尘埃(等待)
竟累积成伤害
(合)
转身离开分手说不出来
蔚蓝的珊瑚海
错过瞬间苍白
当初彼此(你我都)
不够成熟坦白(不应该)
热情不再(你的)
笑容勉强不来
爱深埋珊瑚海
(周杰伦)
毁坏的沙雕如何重来
有裂痕的爱怎么重盖
只是一切结束太快
你说你无法释怀
贝壳里隐藏什么期待(等花儿开)
我们也已经无心再猜
面向海风(面向海风)咸咸的爱(咸咸的爱)
尝不出还有未来
转身离开分手说不出来
海鸟跟鱼相爱
只是一场意外
我们的爱(我们的爱)
差异一直存在(回不来)
风中尘埃(等待)
竟累积成伤害
转身离开分手说不出来
蔚蓝的珊瑚海
错过瞬间苍白
当初彼此(你我都)
不够成熟坦白(不应该)
热情不在(你的)
笑容勉强不来
爱深埋珊瑚海...
Look back...
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Wednesday, 6 April 2011
The animation that I've made from the screenshots of the flash "Love" in www.donghaeng.net .
Graphics speak thousands of words... Ponder... ... ...
Look back, and you'll see how much He had done for you...
Nothing can't be changed...
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Monday, 4 April 2011
Dr. Isaac shared about this person during the youth conference, he is Nicky Cruz. His change is indeed a great blessing! Here is Nicky's testimony:
I could never have claimed to be a holy angel; because I certainly was not!
My parents filled my life with sorcery and the occult. When I was six years old, I was doomed to the devil. My family was under the devil’s power for many years. No one would have guessed that Jesus Christ could have an effect on the Cruz family.
At home I was totally left out and sent away by my mother. She had called me the “devil’ son”. I never believed that she would get rid of me. The lifestyle and the situation we lived in really had an effect. The feeling of being left out was so terrible for me! It hurt inside and I was fully torn apart. I was a very lonely BOY on the streets.
After I left Puerto Rico and came to New York I was really pulled into the suction of evil.
Satan had taken me by the scruff of the neck and had control over me. I was one of his string puppets which he could play with. Everything was so low! – He had given me what I wanted; but I stood there with a bag full of loneliness, insecurity and fear! I bounced around with an empty heart, a guilty conscience and a hand full of blood in a fearful city without anywhere to go apart from straight to hell! It is difficult when we say this word “hell”.
Lots of people have a psychological problem with such words; but I must say, I never would have thought that Jesus could change my life so completely whatever I have done with my hands and have seen with my eyes. I could never have thought it would be possible that it could be so nice to have a personal loving relationship with him so that we can feel so secure and protected and don’t have to fear anything. The bible says: "Do not be afraid because I am with you!"
As I stood on the streets I did not have these promises because I did not know Jesus. I do not look for him and I did not want him. For me he was simply a further confusion. The judges in New York and a psychiatrist who had treated me for 6 months had given up on me.
As I walked along the streets of New York the people were scared of me because I had a bad reputation. I was a gang leader of 205 boys and 175 girls. They did everything I told them to. I controlled them! We did lots of things from murder to bad little delinquents. We did not have any respect for life nor for anything else. I was so deep down in hell that no therapy in the world could have saved me from the darkness.
No clinic could have cleansed my heart and renewed my thoughts. My psychiatrist even took me to the zoo – he wanted to see if I could recognise the names of the animals. 3 hours were spent there until he had explained all of the animals and showed them all. But I came to the conclusion that the monkey was not at all similar to me. I thought it was ugly and I convinced myself that I was handsome. The psychiatrist took me the Empire State Building, the Statue of Liberty and to visit another therapy clinic. Eventually he gave up and said: "Nicky, there is no hope for you anymore. You’re right for the electric stool and straight to hell. You are so ill because you are made of hate. You are completely torn up inside because of hate and bitterness. Yes, I believe that. You hate the whole world and everyone who shows you love and probably yourself as well." That’s true, he was right.
Since the day when I was 8 years old and my mother threw me out I have rejected everyone who has even tried to show me love. If my mother did not love me I could not expect that any strangers could love me. That’s why I became such a bad man on the streets.
Three weeks after my psychiatrist had given up, God did something wonderful for me. He said to David Wilkerson: "Go and fetch Nicky Cruz!" I can imagine that David thought:
"Never! I don’t want anything to do with that gangster boss!" But he obeyed the voice of the Lord. Who was this David Wilkerson? He was just a thin, skinny preacher, as slender as a piece of "Spaghetti"! He did not know how to dress and he had never been to the big city. Up until then he was a pastor in a small village in Pennsylvania and this skinny countryside preacher came to us! He stood here and talked about God in the worst area of New York; a town which was surpressingly filled with sin and the underworld! You could see it in the people’s eyes when they came into the room and saw how the people lived. That is called “America’s freedom”. You can see people from the upper classes of society, who are as jammed together as the poor who have no hope anymore. Now this preacher is standing on the streets and everything is against him. The police advised him "do not go there, they will kill you!" - It was an urgent warning.
David Wilkerson knew the danger but he came anyway! As he started to talk about God, I said: "Aah, give up you’re a nutcase! He’s totally mad, he’s lost the plot! No one had ever stood up to me in these streets and here came a man with a black book which he called the bible, and wants me to take it in!" When he did not want to give up I screamed: "Be quiet you, I am God! This here is people power, ghetto power and that is gang power! God doesn’t have anything to do with us and we don’t want anything to do with him. See that you get out of here and don't ever come back!" Then I asked one of my pals: "Do you want to have some fun? I'll give you what you need. We'll go down to the basement, smoke some weed, drink wine and pop a couple of pills. Then we'll get a girl for the night and forget this nutter altogether. Come on, let's go."
We went down into the basement. I put a record on and imagined how this preacher had already gone back to the place he came from. However 20 minutes later along came this lanky, thin man through the door again. He didn't have permission, just a big smile on his face. David Wilkerson was consciously aware of what would face him but he came in anyway.
He asked: "Where is Nicky Cruz? " I pushed the girl to one side and stormed up to him: "I am Nicky, what do you want? " David said: "I want to be your friend." I retaliated: "I certainly don't want to be your friend!" He came over to me. Then I hit him. Blood came out of his nose; I attacked him and spat on him like a wild animal! Then I called him every bad name under the sun.
I even bad-mouthed God. Then I grabbed him by the hair and hit his head against the wall until some of my friends pulled me away. They tried to tell me that: "The preacher means no harm!" I went to the door. Then David Wilkerson called after me: "Nicky, before you go out of the door, I just want to tell you that Jesus loves you!"
The living Holy Ghost has etched these words into my life! As David said to me: "Nicky, Jesus loves you", I felt the words go through me like a knife being stabbed into me. I went out. However every night was like hearing a broken record which kept playing in my heart saying: "Jesus loves you, Jesus loves you!"
Everywhere I went I thought about the preacher. I could not sleep anymore. I had tried to threaten him, even pointed a knife at him, but he didn't bat an eyelid. He said to me: "You can kill me and cut me into a thousand pieces, but these thousand will call out to you: "Jesus loves you!"
That had hit me between the eyes! "The preacher is brave", I thought. "He is strong, he has something inside!" From the outside he is just a skinny bloke and inside he is made of steel!" - He was a child of God! He was handsome. Whatever it was, that man was brave! On the evening when I broke his nose he could have walked off and said: "Forget it, I won't come back again!" but he had a special command from God: "You must stay there!".
I went to hear David Wilkerson preaching. I went to a Christian meeting for the very first time. I hadn't been in a church in my life and didn't know what these buildings looked like from inside. I took 75 blokes along with me, we had loaded guns with us. I was in a very dangerous area. There were around 2000 people there. They saw how these animal-like blokes stormed in. They wrecked everything, pushed the people aside, started to swear and made all possible threats.
The atmosphere was so tense! Maybe some of them were scared because we simply barged in. But David said, "Nothing will happen to you tonight." David Wilkerson started to preach. He had tried to speak to us on the same level as Jesus Christ. I had never heard the story of Jesus. The first time that he had said that Jesus loves me, I had opened my thoughts to this.
I wanted to know where this Jesus came from. He began to explain this. Anyone who has read the stories in the New Testament will know what a fascinating person Jesus was and still is today. David started off by talking about him as a human version of God, how he had worked so many miracles which could only happen through the holy power of God. On the other hand he suffered like a person - like Nicky Cruz. However he was only filled with the love of salvation. He always wanted to help and despite this the preacher said: "The human race crucified him!" They were so cruel to him. They did not just want to hurt him but also humiliate him; and then I began to think about how he had felt.
The preacher’s words had hit me hard! He had painted a wonderful picture of Jesus for me.
I had understood how he was ignored and thrown out. I also realised that the people wanted to crucify him; and I could still here my mother’s voice: "You are not my son. I don’t love you. You are the son of Satan!"
I could also hear the voice of society: "Shut him away, kill him, he is sick. He will never amount to anything, he’s too dangerous. The only hope for him is the electric chair!" - Ignored und abandoned! Yes, I knew how Jesus had felt! However there was a big difference between him and me: He was the pure son of son and had sacrificed himself for others.
Nicky Cruz was different! I was a sinner, yes, I was in the clutches of sin and chained by evil. Society was right to want to kill me. Then they wouldn’t any more problems with me. In Jesus’ heart there was a different story to be read: "Nicky Cruz needs a new heart!" – The people had wanted to change others and I had refused the possibilities in society.
The state of New York spends millions of dollars to beat the gang core. Clubs had been opened to get them off the streets. After 3 months we had burnt the clubs down. The "Ghettos" are the worst areas of New York City. It is a jungle without laws! You can go through the streets and smell the greasy food, yes, you can even smell the diseases which spread around by the thousand. There is one block of flats after the next in which humans and animals live together. The New York City Council wants to knock the flats down and rebuild them. They want to send the people from the ghetto into new houses in the hop that they will behave better, but the problem doesn't lie there.
A new house does not change the pain in their hearts! It does not bring redemption for the plagued thoughts. If we were to give them new houses the old problems would be back within 6 months. They would make the nicest housing into a ghetto again because the change has to come from the heart; and if the heart doesn’t change then it doesn’t matter where we put the people – they won’t appreciate it. Only Jesus himself can change a heart! He had really come to free the people from the ghetto, yes, he freed the ghetto from inside them, because there is the solution to the problem: The broken heart. The bible says that the heart is evil: one day we love with it and the next day we hate. It is a constant up and down. The mind is like a computer, you can save good and bad things. As David Wilkerson had ended his speech on that night I asked myself why Jesus had died for me, why was he crucified? On this evening he was no longer thinking about the people 2000 years ago - he was thinking about me. He also died for Nicky Cruz. – I took the biggest decision of my life in that night!
This preacher had reached me. He had ripped my old heart out and my new heart beat for Jesus! I felt something that I had never felt before: "This bad atmosphere had left me." All at once the presence of God was in the room! If I had never experienced and accepted Jesus Christ I could never say that I had felt the power of God on that night. The people all held hands. They started to cry and they started to pray everywhere. The Holy Spirit washed over the room like a wave. I looked around and my friends were crying too. David Wilkerson was also very moved; he cried quite shakily and then he opened his eyes and said to me:
"Nicky, give Jesus the opportunity to come into your life for once. You have always ran away from him. You have been pushed out by everyone but Jesus of Nazareth wants to come to you now. He wants to be a real friend to you now and here. Come on, Nicky, I want to pray for you!" I was such a proud person on the streets, so proud that I was lowered by it. I lived according to one idea: I must be someone! And now I was standing opposite Jesus shaking my head and saying: "No, that is not my thing!" My friend, whose first name was Israel, stood up and asked David: "Pray for me, I want to go to Jesus!"
I thought: "The bloke has gone crazy!" But he was not crazy - I was! For the first time in his life, Israel was on the right path. He was a typical criminal; he looked good, was polite but was full of evil. Now he saw me and said: "Nicky, come with me. The preacher is right. Come one, you're the worst." I looked at Israel, pulled all of my confidence together and said: "Okay, I will go with you", and went with him to the front. 25 of my pals joined us.
I did not know what to expect because I did not know Jesus. I did not have any faith in him; but I had felt the change in me as I heard who Jesus was and where he came from. The preacher stood in front of me. I said to him: "Well pray, do something! Give it a go, if God wants to change me then give it a try!" Then I laughed at him. He had looked me directly in the eyes and asked me to close them to pray.
But I refused: "No, no I don't want to close my eyes! If I close them a bullet will be shot through my head. No, I won't shut my eyes. You are crazy!" - He placed his hands on my head and began to pray. As David prayed I had to cry. The most simple and beautiful prayer I have ever heard came from his heart. He had talked to God like he would talk to a friend standing next to him. And he was right - Jesus was there. This simple, friendly talk with God had really gotten through to me! - That had touched me! David Wilkerson did not have the slightest bit of falseness, he was real. I saw through him and nothing else; and through this love which he had for me and for Jesus, God could have an effect on me. I saw how my friends were crying, Israel was particularly torn to pieces. You couldn't even begin to describe how he felt. The tears fell over his face in streams. I shook him and asked: "What is wrong with you?" He said: "Nicky, I have handed my life over to Jesus."
I bowed my head down and thought: "Now I have lost my friend to Jesus." Then I suddenly felt alone again and my thoughts went back to a terrible experience. However the Holy Spirit managed to put the puzzle together again and I saw myself naked in the holy presence of God. He had touched my heart and showed me: "That is you; but if you present me with your heart I want to stay with you, love you and change you." Then the tears started to flow.
Lots of tears flowed over my face and ran over my leather jacket. I stood there for around 3 minutes and did not move at all. I was simply broken! I almost drowned in my own tears; tears of pain and penance, tears of bitterness and confusion. Then I felt how two hands took me by the shoulders - it was no other than Jesus!
And I went down on my knees. That was the lowliest thing which had ever happened to me! I kneeled down and cried out loudly in front of the whole gang - I cried with an unbelievable pain inside. Then I opened my mouth and said: "O God, I do not love; I have never searched for you, but I am confused. Do you really, really love me?
Please help me! I need help!" - In the most important moment he came to me! He had heard my little confused prayer. I thought that I was so far away from anything human, but I had never been so close! After I had felt a deep remorse for all of my sins, from this moment on three unnatural miracles happened in my life - three things which were more mind blowing than a healing miracle.
God had presented me with the biggest and most important gift: love. I can now love God and other people without being a hypocrite. I could have never said "I love you" to a person before. For the first time I could respect myself and God. I had been christened with love. In the world I had come from there was no peace for me. Everything was mixed up. There was lots of loneliness and bitterness. However he gave me his deep and wonderful peace with which he filled my soul.
I have experienced it! Now I could close my eyes and say my last prayer - and I could sleep again. God even cared for me in my sleep; there was no more drug addiction, prostitution and no more criminality for me! I did not have to run away anymore or move from one place the next because people could not stand me. No, I had peace and joy all of a sudden! I could go everywhere I wanted and laugh from the heart.
I did not even need to drink anymore; because if I wanted to drink alcohol the Holy Ghost was there and could protect me from it. No one could have given me this, no psychiatrist, only Dr. Jesus Christ! - You might ask now: How bad was Nicky-Cruz? Did Jesus really change him so much? I can truly say to anyone: The only truth is Jesus!
If you also want to fell his unbelievably great saving love, open your hear to him because Jesus will be with you. My mother has changed as well. She is not a witch anymore, nowadays she loves Jesus too. My brothers have also given their lives to the Lord along with my friends who were in my gang
They come to God one after the other. If someone asked me: "Nicky Cruz, where are you going? " I would answer: "My life has a meaning without any doubt and I know where I am going: my path is leading to heaven and I am focussed on meeting Jesus Christ - in all of his glory!"
I could never have claimed to be a holy angel; because I certainly was not!
My parents filled my life with sorcery and the occult. When I was six years old, I was doomed to the devil. My family was under the devil’s power for many years. No one would have guessed that Jesus Christ could have an effect on the Cruz family.
At home I was totally left out and sent away by my mother. She had called me the “devil’ son”. I never believed that she would get rid of me. The lifestyle and the situation we lived in really had an effect. The feeling of being left out was so terrible for me! It hurt inside and I was fully torn apart. I was a very lonely BOY on the streets.
After I left Puerto Rico and came to New York I was really pulled into the suction of evil.
Satan had taken me by the scruff of the neck and had control over me. I was one of his string puppets which he could play with. Everything was so low! – He had given me what I wanted; but I stood there with a bag full of loneliness, insecurity and fear! I bounced around with an empty heart, a guilty conscience and a hand full of blood in a fearful city without anywhere to go apart from straight to hell! It is difficult when we say this word “hell”.
Lots of people have a psychological problem with such words; but I must say, I never would have thought that Jesus could change my life so completely whatever I have done with my hands and have seen with my eyes. I could never have thought it would be possible that it could be so nice to have a personal loving relationship with him so that we can feel so secure and protected and don’t have to fear anything. The bible says: "Do not be afraid because I am with you!"
As I stood on the streets I did not have these promises because I did not know Jesus. I do not look for him and I did not want him. For me he was simply a further confusion. The judges in New York and a psychiatrist who had treated me for 6 months had given up on me.
As I walked along the streets of New York the people were scared of me because I had a bad reputation. I was a gang leader of 205 boys and 175 girls. They did everything I told them to. I controlled them! We did lots of things from murder to bad little delinquents. We did not have any respect for life nor for anything else. I was so deep down in hell that no therapy in the world could have saved me from the darkness.
No clinic could have cleansed my heart and renewed my thoughts. My psychiatrist even took me to the zoo – he wanted to see if I could recognise the names of the animals. 3 hours were spent there until he had explained all of the animals and showed them all. But I came to the conclusion that the monkey was not at all similar to me. I thought it was ugly and I convinced myself that I was handsome. The psychiatrist took me the Empire State Building, the Statue of Liberty and to visit another therapy clinic. Eventually he gave up and said: "Nicky, there is no hope for you anymore. You’re right for the electric stool and straight to hell. You are so ill because you are made of hate. You are completely torn up inside because of hate and bitterness. Yes, I believe that. You hate the whole world and everyone who shows you love and probably yourself as well." That’s true, he was right.
Since the day when I was 8 years old and my mother threw me out I have rejected everyone who has even tried to show me love. If my mother did not love me I could not expect that any strangers could love me. That’s why I became such a bad man on the streets.
Three weeks after my psychiatrist had given up, God did something wonderful for me. He said to David Wilkerson: "Go and fetch Nicky Cruz!" I can imagine that David thought:
"Never! I don’t want anything to do with that gangster boss!" But he obeyed the voice of the Lord. Who was this David Wilkerson? He was just a thin, skinny preacher, as slender as a piece of "Spaghetti"! He did not know how to dress and he had never been to the big city. Up until then he was a pastor in a small village in Pennsylvania and this skinny countryside preacher came to us! He stood here and talked about God in the worst area of New York; a town which was surpressingly filled with sin and the underworld! You could see it in the people’s eyes when they came into the room and saw how the people lived. That is called “America’s freedom”. You can see people from the upper classes of society, who are as jammed together as the poor who have no hope anymore. Now this preacher is standing on the streets and everything is against him. The police advised him "do not go there, they will kill you!" - It was an urgent warning.
David Wilkerson knew the danger but he came anyway! As he started to talk about God, I said: "Aah, give up you’re a nutcase! He’s totally mad, he’s lost the plot! No one had ever stood up to me in these streets and here came a man with a black book which he called the bible, and wants me to take it in!" When he did not want to give up I screamed: "Be quiet you, I am God! This here is people power, ghetto power and that is gang power! God doesn’t have anything to do with us and we don’t want anything to do with him. See that you get out of here and don't ever come back!" Then I asked one of my pals: "Do you want to have some fun? I'll give you what you need. We'll go down to the basement, smoke some weed, drink wine and pop a couple of pills. Then we'll get a girl for the night and forget this nutter altogether. Come on, let's go."
We went down into the basement. I put a record on and imagined how this preacher had already gone back to the place he came from. However 20 minutes later along came this lanky, thin man through the door again. He didn't have permission, just a big smile on his face. David Wilkerson was consciously aware of what would face him but he came in anyway.
He asked: "Where is Nicky Cruz? " I pushed the girl to one side and stormed up to him: "I am Nicky, what do you want? " David said: "I want to be your friend." I retaliated: "I certainly don't want to be your friend!" He came over to me. Then I hit him. Blood came out of his nose; I attacked him and spat on him like a wild animal! Then I called him every bad name under the sun.
I even bad-mouthed God. Then I grabbed him by the hair and hit his head against the wall until some of my friends pulled me away. They tried to tell me that: "The preacher means no harm!" I went to the door. Then David Wilkerson called after me: "Nicky, before you go out of the door, I just want to tell you that Jesus loves you!"
The living Holy Ghost has etched these words into my life! As David said to me: "Nicky, Jesus loves you", I felt the words go through me like a knife being stabbed into me. I went out. However every night was like hearing a broken record which kept playing in my heart saying: "Jesus loves you, Jesus loves you!"
Everywhere I went I thought about the preacher. I could not sleep anymore. I had tried to threaten him, even pointed a knife at him, but he didn't bat an eyelid. He said to me: "You can kill me and cut me into a thousand pieces, but these thousand will call out to you: "Jesus loves you!"
That had hit me between the eyes! "The preacher is brave", I thought. "He is strong, he has something inside!" From the outside he is just a skinny bloke and inside he is made of steel!" - He was a child of God! He was handsome. Whatever it was, that man was brave! On the evening when I broke his nose he could have walked off and said: "Forget it, I won't come back again!" but he had a special command from God: "You must stay there!".
I went to hear David Wilkerson preaching. I went to a Christian meeting for the very first time. I hadn't been in a church in my life and didn't know what these buildings looked like from inside. I took 75 blokes along with me, we had loaded guns with us. I was in a very dangerous area. There were around 2000 people there. They saw how these animal-like blokes stormed in. They wrecked everything, pushed the people aside, started to swear and made all possible threats.
The atmosphere was so tense! Maybe some of them were scared because we simply barged in. But David said, "Nothing will happen to you tonight." David Wilkerson started to preach. He had tried to speak to us on the same level as Jesus Christ. I had never heard the story of Jesus. The first time that he had said that Jesus loves me, I had opened my thoughts to this.
I wanted to know where this Jesus came from. He began to explain this. Anyone who has read the stories in the New Testament will know what a fascinating person Jesus was and still is today. David started off by talking about him as a human version of God, how he had worked so many miracles which could only happen through the holy power of God. On the other hand he suffered like a person - like Nicky Cruz. However he was only filled with the love of salvation. He always wanted to help and despite this the preacher said: "The human race crucified him!" They were so cruel to him. They did not just want to hurt him but also humiliate him; and then I began to think about how he had felt.
The preacher’s words had hit me hard! He had painted a wonderful picture of Jesus for me.
I had understood how he was ignored and thrown out. I also realised that the people wanted to crucify him; and I could still here my mother’s voice: "You are not my son. I don’t love you. You are the son of Satan!"
I could also hear the voice of society: "Shut him away, kill him, he is sick. He will never amount to anything, he’s too dangerous. The only hope for him is the electric chair!" - Ignored und abandoned! Yes, I knew how Jesus had felt! However there was a big difference between him and me: He was the pure son of son and had sacrificed himself for others.
Nicky Cruz was different! I was a sinner, yes, I was in the clutches of sin and chained by evil. Society was right to want to kill me. Then they wouldn’t any more problems with me. In Jesus’ heart there was a different story to be read: "Nicky Cruz needs a new heart!" – The people had wanted to change others and I had refused the possibilities in society.
The state of New York spends millions of dollars to beat the gang core. Clubs had been opened to get them off the streets. After 3 months we had burnt the clubs down. The "Ghettos" are the worst areas of New York City. It is a jungle without laws! You can go through the streets and smell the greasy food, yes, you can even smell the diseases which spread around by the thousand. There is one block of flats after the next in which humans and animals live together. The New York City Council wants to knock the flats down and rebuild them. They want to send the people from the ghetto into new houses in the hop that they will behave better, but the problem doesn't lie there.
A new house does not change the pain in their hearts! It does not bring redemption for the plagued thoughts. If we were to give them new houses the old problems would be back within 6 months. They would make the nicest housing into a ghetto again because the change has to come from the heart; and if the heart doesn’t change then it doesn’t matter where we put the people – they won’t appreciate it. Only Jesus himself can change a heart! He had really come to free the people from the ghetto, yes, he freed the ghetto from inside them, because there is the solution to the problem: The broken heart. The bible says that the heart is evil: one day we love with it and the next day we hate. It is a constant up and down. The mind is like a computer, you can save good and bad things. As David Wilkerson had ended his speech on that night I asked myself why Jesus had died for me, why was he crucified? On this evening he was no longer thinking about the people 2000 years ago - he was thinking about me. He also died for Nicky Cruz. – I took the biggest decision of my life in that night!
This preacher had reached me. He had ripped my old heart out and my new heart beat for Jesus! I felt something that I had never felt before: "This bad atmosphere had left me." All at once the presence of God was in the room! If I had never experienced and accepted Jesus Christ I could never say that I had felt the power of God on that night. The people all held hands. They started to cry and they started to pray everywhere. The Holy Spirit washed over the room like a wave. I looked around and my friends were crying too. David Wilkerson was also very moved; he cried quite shakily and then he opened his eyes and said to me:
"Nicky, give Jesus the opportunity to come into your life for once. You have always ran away from him. You have been pushed out by everyone but Jesus of Nazareth wants to come to you now. He wants to be a real friend to you now and here. Come on, Nicky, I want to pray for you!" I was such a proud person on the streets, so proud that I was lowered by it. I lived according to one idea: I must be someone! And now I was standing opposite Jesus shaking my head and saying: "No, that is not my thing!" My friend, whose first name was Israel, stood up and asked David: "Pray for me, I want to go to Jesus!"
I thought: "The bloke has gone crazy!" But he was not crazy - I was! For the first time in his life, Israel was on the right path. He was a typical criminal; he looked good, was polite but was full of evil. Now he saw me and said: "Nicky, come with me. The preacher is right. Come one, you're the worst." I looked at Israel, pulled all of my confidence together and said: "Okay, I will go with you", and went with him to the front. 25 of my pals joined us.
I did not know what to expect because I did not know Jesus. I did not have any faith in him; but I had felt the change in me as I heard who Jesus was and where he came from. The preacher stood in front of me. I said to him: "Well pray, do something! Give it a go, if God wants to change me then give it a try!" Then I laughed at him. He had looked me directly in the eyes and asked me to close them to pray.
But I refused: "No, no I don't want to close my eyes! If I close them a bullet will be shot through my head. No, I won't shut my eyes. You are crazy!" - He placed his hands on my head and began to pray. As David prayed I had to cry. The most simple and beautiful prayer I have ever heard came from his heart. He had talked to God like he would talk to a friend standing next to him. And he was right - Jesus was there. This simple, friendly talk with God had really gotten through to me! - That had touched me! David Wilkerson did not have the slightest bit of falseness, he was real. I saw through him and nothing else; and through this love which he had for me and for Jesus, God could have an effect on me. I saw how my friends were crying, Israel was particularly torn to pieces. You couldn't even begin to describe how he felt. The tears fell over his face in streams. I shook him and asked: "What is wrong with you?" He said: "Nicky, I have handed my life over to Jesus."
I bowed my head down and thought: "Now I have lost my friend to Jesus." Then I suddenly felt alone again and my thoughts went back to a terrible experience. However the Holy Spirit managed to put the puzzle together again and I saw myself naked in the holy presence of God. He had touched my heart and showed me: "That is you; but if you present me with your heart I want to stay with you, love you and change you." Then the tears started to flow.
Lots of tears flowed over my face and ran over my leather jacket. I stood there for around 3 minutes and did not move at all. I was simply broken! I almost drowned in my own tears; tears of pain and penance, tears of bitterness and confusion. Then I felt how two hands took me by the shoulders - it was no other than Jesus!
And I went down on my knees. That was the lowliest thing which had ever happened to me! I kneeled down and cried out loudly in front of the whole gang - I cried with an unbelievable pain inside. Then I opened my mouth and said: "O God, I do not love; I have never searched for you, but I am confused. Do you really, really love me?
Please help me! I need help!" - In the most important moment he came to me! He had heard my little confused prayer. I thought that I was so far away from anything human, but I had never been so close! After I had felt a deep remorse for all of my sins, from this moment on three unnatural miracles happened in my life - three things which were more mind blowing than a healing miracle.
God had presented me with the biggest and most important gift: love. I can now love God and other people without being a hypocrite. I could have never said "I love you" to a person before. For the first time I could respect myself and God. I had been christened with love. In the world I had come from there was no peace for me. Everything was mixed up. There was lots of loneliness and bitterness. However he gave me his deep and wonderful peace with which he filled my soul.
I have experienced it! Now I could close my eyes and say my last prayer - and I could sleep again. God even cared for me in my sleep; there was no more drug addiction, prostitution and no more criminality for me! I did not have to run away anymore or move from one place the next because people could not stand me. No, I had peace and joy all of a sudden! I could go everywhere I wanted and laugh from the heart.
I did not even need to drink anymore; because if I wanted to drink alcohol the Holy Ghost was there and could protect me from it. No one could have given me this, no psychiatrist, only Dr. Jesus Christ! - You might ask now: How bad was Nicky-Cruz? Did Jesus really change him so much? I can truly say to anyone: The only truth is Jesus!
If you also want to fell his unbelievably great saving love, open your hear to him because Jesus will be with you. My mother has changed as well. She is not a witch anymore, nowadays she loves Jesus too. My brothers have also given their lives to the Lord along with my friends who were in my gang
They come to God one after the other. If someone asked me: "Nicky Cruz, where are you going? " I would answer: "My life has a meaning without any doubt and I know where I am going: my path is leading to heaven and I am focussed on meeting Jesus Christ - in all of his glory!"
God has changed Nicky, He can change you too!
Jesus Loves You So Much!
This Is The Day That The Lord Hath Made!
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Sunday, 3 April 2011
April 2, 2011-Yes indeed! This is the day that the Lord hath made! I attended the "Youth Conference" organised by The Boys' Brigade and The Girls' Brigade in collaboration with Kuching Timber Store KTS Group today. Lots of BB and GB members from different companies were gathered under one roof. A week before today, I was actually thinking of not attending it, I don't know why. But, somehow, I changed my mind. I know all that happened were not coincidents, it is Him that arranged them in His wonderful plan.
Today is indeed a blessed day, and once again I'm recharged! Thank God... =)
The theme for the conference today is "Under Construction". Yes, the road sign that you can see whenever there are some repair works at the roadside. We, the youths are still under God's construction, He has wonderful plans in our life. Like a potter and the clay(Isaiah 64:8), with His hands, He moulds us in His image and everyone is unique in His eyes, no doubt.
The program started off with welcoming addresses by our Southern Regional Council Chairman, Capt. Norman Ng, followed by Senior Manager of KTS. Bla bla bla... I'm not going to elaborate on that. Then here comes the great moment. Praise and Worship by ACTS team from St. Faith. Their musics were awesome! The rhythm and the melody heat up the atmosphere for praise and worship. The crunch of the electric guitars made the singing session a lot lively, really different from what we have been doing during singspiration time on parade. The songs were fantastic, praise the Lord! I'm sure, lots of the participants were moved by the lyrics and the heavenly melody! It's all too much to be just put into a few sentences. I can only say, "WHOA!"
The event continued with the sharing of Good News from Dr. Isaac Biju, who is currently a Computer Science lecturer in SwinBurne(WOO COMPUTER SCIENCE! LOL). "Under Construction", it is indeed a suitable phrase to describe youths today. Dr. Isaac shared about how a pottery is made. Firstly, the clay will be washed, to remove pebbles and sediments to ensure that the clay is smooth. Then, potters will press the clay and knead it. Follow by shaping of the clay on a spinner. Last but not least, the shaped clay will be fired a few times, until it is hard and ready for colouring. All these are to be done with passion and patience. That's how God shape us, so that we can be blessings to others.
Here comes the career talk after Dr. Isaac's sharing. The organizer has invited 4 speakers from different field, they were pharmacist, civil engineer, teacher and graphic designer. None of them are of my cup of tea, sigh... We were told that being a pharmacist or engineer is indeed a rewarding career. One can either work in government or private sector. Graphic designer seems to be an interesting job for creative person, nah I'm out.. Haha! And now teacher... The way of Madam Grace spoke reminds me of teachers in our school... I miss school... Teacher is a calling, that's what Madam Grace said. You can nurture young boys and girls and evangelize at the same time. It is such a noble job, and it is lacking of Christian teachers nowadays! I sighed... Madam Grace also explained how we can apply for teacher training course, the pay(IT IS EQUALLY REWARDING AS THE OTHER PROFESSIONAL CAREERS!), and some statistics made... I quote this from her sharing, which is also the conclusion of her session, "Teacher is the only government-paid missionary ministry!" Oh yes, I love that quote!
Woots! It's lunch time... Surprisingly, it is in buffet style! Yeah! No fall-in! GREAT LOL
So, we waited for the girls to take the food first, so gentlemen le? LOL just joking... We queued and finally it's our turn. I see ham, sandwiches, more sandwiches and more sandwiches! LOL! Haha! Sandwiches for lunch, not bad uh! There were satays and sauteed fishcakes too. Hmm... Not bad overall, just that the smell of onion is too strong for the ham, it ruins the taste and the texture. However, I'm still grateful I got food to eat.
After lunch, it is the session for BGR talk after another great session of praise and worship. BGR? It is boy-girl relationship if you don't know. It is indeed an interesting topic. Madam Grace shared with us some of her counselling experiences. She encountered a lot of cases where secondary school students get pregnant, which is the aftermath of premarital sex. And there are only two choices, which is either abort it, or give birth. Aborting is really inhumane. SO TEENS! DON'T MAKE THIS MISTAKE! Madam Grace also showed to us briefly some of the abandoned and premature babies. It is so saddening. Pathetic. And we the boys were asked to leave the room so that boys and girls were separated for further discussion. And this is the cracking part. HAHAHA! Many funny answers and of course there are practical ones too. So after separated discussion, we were in the hall again to share the answer of discussions. The first question is, "What do you think of yourself and the opposite sex? For example, appearance, emotions and others". Both parties gave many brilliant answers, but mostly, practical answers were given by the girls. I do agree that boys are childish, sometime. xD I can't remember well the next 3 questions, but the last question which is the 5th, I shall not forget. We boys got the super-duper-hilarious-ridiculous-unbelievable answer. Here is how the questions sounds, "What are the practical ways of preventing premarital sex during dating time?" So the girls got a few answers like, "setting boundary before dating, slap him(LOL), etc" Interesting hmm.. Slap him... LOL
Then it is the boys' turn, Captain Michael represented us. Here are our answers, "studying bible, don't touch touch(LOLOLOL), etc" And as Captain Michael is going to say out the last answer, he gulped and silence falls(well, some boys already burst into laughter LOL). Then he said, "Well, some of the boys suggested that they should just cut off their balls." LOL the hall was echoed with laughters for several seconds! HAHAHA!! Beh tahan! LMAO
After sharing the hilarious answers, Madam Grace continued on with her sharing. Telling us more and more cases that she encountered in school and church(yes, church). There was one case, it is about a girl. During SPM exam time, she called Madam Grace, saying that she has to sit for the paper in hospital. Then Madam Grace asked her what happened. She remained silent for a moment. And finally she answered that she just gave birth the day before and started weeping as she told Madam Grace more. How sad it is, there are many more examples, which are certainly good reminders for us, NEVER STEP INTO THE TRAP OF PREMARITAL SEX! And with that, Madam Grace ended her sharing. After so many cases, Madam Grace agreed with the boys, saying, "Maybe the last answer from the boys is the best solution of all!" Everyone cracked again. HAHAHA! What a humorous teacher!
Here comes another session with Dr. Isaac. He continued what he had shared in the morning. "This last 30 minutes will probably change your life," said the handsome doctor. And yes, the Holy Spirit is doing the miracle. Praise God! He talked about how different is the love of human and the love of God. He shared a video with us, which you can watch it from here: MUST WATCH!
It is a story of a man who has a son. And he loves him more than anything. One day, a tragic incident happened. As you can see in the video, the man work as the railway drawbridge operator. As he receives call from the central station, he opened the drawbridge to allow the ship to pass by. His son was fishing at that time. But, somehow, the train was seen not far away by his son. He was trying to tell his father that the train is coming, but sadly, his father didn't know that. Worrying that the train will run into the open drawbridge, the son ran to the gearbox and tried to close the drawbridge. Accidentally, he fell into the small cavity, and the tragedy is about to happen. The father, sitting in the small operator room, finally sees the fast-coming train and realised that his son is in danger! He is in great dilemma, a decision has to be made, to save his beloved son? Or to save the hundreds of lives in the train? As the train is approaching, reluctantly, he pulled the lever and let the bridge crush his son. It is such a touching scene, how great is the sacrifice. Although I have watched it for a few times, but I'm still moved.
God has seen that humans have been committing sins. No doubt, we lie, we steal, we get angry, we hurt others' feeling and many more. And we all are going to hell with all those sins, for the price of sins is death. God sees that a salvation must be made. So he sent his only son to the world, to suffer for OUR SINS! Before he was crucified on Golgotha, the journey to the crucifixion ground was a hard one. The soldiers whipped Jesus with the leather, tied with sharp things. That tore His flesh apart, the whole scene was gory.
With every strike, the sharp things pierce into the flesh, and it was pulled out. I can't imagine how tormenting it was for Jesus. Blood wet the paths as Jesus, holding the cross and being whipped as he made his way to Golgotha.
He was crucified. And there is one more punishment, which is 10 times more painful then the whipping and the crucifixion. In Matthew 27:46 - About three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”). Jesus was suffering hell when he shouted, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?". Hell means no relationship at all with God, and Jesus was suffering that FOR US, FOR OUR SINS! The price of our sins is paid on the cross. But, Jesus can't be held by death, as he sinless! He rises from death after 3 days! And, He is coming again, very soon...
John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
Today is indeed a blessed day, and once again I'm recharged! Thank God... =)
The program started off with welcoming addresses by our Southern Regional Council Chairman, Capt. Norman Ng, followed by Senior Manager of KTS. Bla bla bla... I'm not going to elaborate on that. Then here comes the great moment. Praise and Worship by ACTS team from St. Faith. Their musics were awesome! The rhythm and the melody heat up the atmosphere for praise and worship. The crunch of the electric guitars made the singing session a lot lively, really different from what we have been doing during singspiration time on parade. The songs were fantastic, praise the Lord! I'm sure, lots of the participants were moved by the lyrics and the heavenly melody! It's all too much to be just put into a few sentences. I can only say, "WHOA!"
The event continued with the sharing of Good News from Dr. Isaac Biju, who is currently a Computer Science lecturer in SwinBurne(WOO COMPUTER SCIENCE! LOL). "Under Construction", it is indeed a suitable phrase to describe youths today. Dr. Isaac shared about how a pottery is made. Firstly, the clay will be washed, to remove pebbles and sediments to ensure that the clay is smooth. Then, potters will press the clay and knead it. Follow by shaping of the clay on a spinner. Last but not least, the shaped clay will be fired a few times, until it is hard and ready for colouring. All these are to be done with passion and patience. That's how God shape us, so that we can be blessings to others.
Here comes the career talk after Dr. Isaac's sharing. The organizer has invited 4 speakers from different field, they were pharmacist, civil engineer, teacher and graphic designer. None of them are of my cup of tea, sigh... We were told that being a pharmacist or engineer is indeed a rewarding career. One can either work in government or private sector. Graphic designer seems to be an interesting job for creative person, nah I'm out.. Haha! And now teacher... The way of Madam Grace spoke reminds me of teachers in our school... I miss school... Teacher is a calling, that's what Madam Grace said. You can nurture young boys and girls and evangelize at the same time. It is such a noble job, and it is lacking of Christian teachers nowadays! I sighed... Madam Grace also explained how we can apply for teacher training course, the pay(IT IS EQUALLY REWARDING AS THE OTHER PROFESSIONAL CAREERS!), and some statistics made... I quote this from her sharing, which is also the conclusion of her session, "Teacher is the only government-paid missionary ministry!" Oh yes, I love that quote!
Woots! It's lunch time... Surprisingly, it is in buffet style! Yeah! No fall-in! GREAT LOL
So, we waited for the girls to take the food first, so gentlemen le? LOL just joking... We queued and finally it's our turn. I see ham, sandwiches, more sandwiches and more sandwiches! LOL! Haha! Sandwiches for lunch, not bad uh! There were satays and sauteed fishcakes too. Hmm... Not bad overall, just that the smell of onion is too strong for the ham, it ruins the taste and the texture. However, I'm still grateful I got food to eat.
After lunch, it is the session for BGR talk after another great session of praise and worship. BGR? It is boy-girl relationship if you don't know. It is indeed an interesting topic. Madam Grace shared with us some of her counselling experiences. She encountered a lot of cases where secondary school students get pregnant, which is the aftermath of premarital sex. And there are only two choices, which is either abort it, or give birth. Aborting is really inhumane. SO TEENS! DON'T MAKE THIS MISTAKE! Madam Grace also showed to us briefly some of the abandoned and premature babies. It is so saddening. Pathetic. And we the boys were asked to leave the room so that boys and girls were separated for further discussion. And this is the cracking part. HAHAHA! Many funny answers and of course there are practical ones too. So after separated discussion, we were in the hall again to share the answer of discussions. The first question is, "What do you think of yourself and the opposite sex? For example, appearance, emotions and others". Both parties gave many brilliant answers, but mostly, practical answers were given by the girls. I do agree that boys are childish, sometime. xD I can't remember well the next 3 questions, but the last question which is the 5th, I shall not forget. We boys got the super-duper-hilarious-ridiculous-unbelievable answer. Here is how the questions sounds, "What are the practical ways of preventing premarital sex during dating time?" So the girls got a few answers like, "setting boundary before dating, slap him(LOL), etc" Interesting hmm.. Slap him... LOL
Then it is the boys' turn, Captain Michael represented us. Here are our answers, "studying bible, don't touch touch(LOLOLOL), etc" And as Captain Michael is going to say out the last answer, he gulped and silence falls(well, some boys already burst into laughter LOL). Then he said, "Well, some of the boys suggested that they should just cut off their balls." LOL the hall was echoed with laughters for several seconds! HAHAHA!! Beh tahan! LMAO
After sharing the hilarious answers, Madam Grace continued on with her sharing. Telling us more and more cases that she encountered in school and church(yes, church). There was one case, it is about a girl. During SPM exam time, she called Madam Grace, saying that she has to sit for the paper in hospital. Then Madam Grace asked her what happened. She remained silent for a moment. And finally she answered that she just gave birth the day before and started weeping as she told Madam Grace more. How sad it is, there are many more examples, which are certainly good reminders for us, NEVER STEP INTO THE TRAP OF PREMARITAL SEX! And with that, Madam Grace ended her sharing. After so many cases, Madam Grace agreed with the boys, saying, "Maybe the last answer from the boys is the best solution of all!" Everyone cracked again. HAHAHA! What a humorous teacher!
Here comes another session with Dr. Isaac. He continued what he had shared in the morning. "This last 30 minutes will probably change your life," said the handsome doctor. And yes, the Holy Spirit is doing the miracle. Praise God! He talked about how different is the love of human and the love of God. He shared a video with us, which you can watch it from here: MUST WATCH!
It is a story of a man who has a son. And he loves him more than anything. One day, a tragic incident happened. As you can see in the video, the man work as the railway drawbridge operator. As he receives call from the central station, he opened the drawbridge to allow the ship to pass by. His son was fishing at that time. But, somehow, the train was seen not far away by his son. He was trying to tell his father that the train is coming, but sadly, his father didn't know that. Worrying that the train will run into the open drawbridge, the son ran to the gearbox and tried to close the drawbridge. Accidentally, he fell into the small cavity, and the tragedy is about to happen. The father, sitting in the small operator room, finally sees the fast-coming train and realised that his son is in danger! He is in great dilemma, a decision has to be made, to save his beloved son? Or to save the hundreds of lives in the train? As the train is approaching, reluctantly, he pulled the lever and let the bridge crush his son. It is such a touching scene, how great is the sacrifice. Although I have watched it for a few times, but I'm still moved.
God has seen that humans have been committing sins. No doubt, we lie, we steal, we get angry, we hurt others' feeling and many more. And we all are going to hell with all those sins, for the price of sins is death. God sees that a salvation must be made. So he sent his only son to the world, to suffer for OUR SINS! Before he was crucified on Golgotha, the journey to the crucifixion ground was a hard one. The soldiers whipped Jesus with the leather, tied with sharp things. That tore His flesh apart, the whole scene was gory.
With that, Dr. Isaac made the calling. Everyone closes their eyes. I know that the Holy Spirit is among us. Thank God, many boys and girls had accepted Jesus as their personal saviour for the first time. It will surely be the great turning point in their life! They are reborn again! I just can't describe how happy I am to hear so many responses. After a few times, the calling ended. I rededicated myself, and Hui Loong too, praise the Lord. We stood up, and a brother prayed for me, the same goes to Loong too. Thank you very much =')
Then, Dr. Isaac prayed for those who were sick, who had personal problems, who can't get away from sin that keep getting around them, and everyone. So many youths went forward, it was indeed a beautiful scene. I know the angels are singing and rejoicing and the Devils are intimidated and retreated! For the salvation has come to the boys and girls today, like a lost sheep return to its shepherd.
The youth conference has come to an end. Again, ACTS team led the crowd and sang in the name of Lord! I really enjoyed the praise and worship session. May God bless them in their ministries and continue to touch souls which are lost. What a wonderful day! xD
Thank you God =D
This Is My Story!
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Friday, 1 April 2011
This was my story,Full of agony,
Full of melancholy;
This was my story,
Where my soul was hungry,
Where my body was weary;
This was my story,I always worry,
Eyes were teary,
For I was like a blemished sheep,
lost in a treacherous valley,
and what was waiting for me,
jeopardy;
But all the miseries were history,
For He had died in Calvary,For the sins of all the unworthy,
Set us free from the sins' condemnatory,
For once and forever
Christ had won the victory!
And now this is my story,
It is another new entry,
of a blessed journey;
This is my story,
in Him I gain my strength daily,
in faith I walk steadily,
no matter sunny or rainy,
I know He is always with me;
And this is my story,
it is not going to be easy,
For the door to heaven is narrow,
and the path is windy;
So, this is my story,
I will follow Him
that's how it's going to be.
Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
This is my story, what is yours?
With His guidance, I know it is going to be an interesting story.
